Lots of times I find myself looking at the world through .. Kelley-colored glasses, and don't tend to notice rifts .. or "cracks" if you will that are disturbing the people around me. (I feel like I stated that very wrongly.) Allow me to give an example. I sometimes can get so wrapped up in like.. assuming that nothing is wrong and/or that old wounds have healed, that I don't notice when my friends are being plagued by old wounds or other such things like that. This has happened before. And I don't think there's a way for me to like.. change the fact that I assume the best and assume that everyone is going to get along with everyone because I get along with the said subset of 'everyone' to which I refer.
Anyway, my point in this is, I want people to feel comfortable talking to me. (Most of my close friends are I think, but this is something that's really important to me & it needs to be said.) If you have a problem of any sort, (especially if it involves me somehow) I want you to know that you can tell me. If you explain your feelings & they are sincere, I can take it. I am not going to hold a grudge against someone for getting their feelings out. Just so we're clear. :)
*Random: I am watching 'The Talk' right now, and they're talking about "Emotional Vampires" ... OHHH this is so appropriate for my current thought process. haha
But OHMY how I feel comforted by hearing this. This has happened to me. THIS IS SO TRUE YOU GUYS. I LOVE THE LADIES OF THE TALK.
Julie Chen is a badass. I love it.
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That was part A of this blog post, and here is part B.
The things that motivate people and make them tick FASCINATE ME. I actually kind of enjoy talking about like.. tough times/issues, because its so interesting me to see how people operate, and how those who have been victimized manage to work through it and overcome inner conflict and grow through those tough times. Also I really just like to learn about people. I feel like knowing someone's past (even if it may be a dark past) helps you understand where that person comes from and why they do what they do and how they respond to things. Its cool.
(Talks with Katherine are my favorite.)
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And from hence comes part C.
...
Oh you, you're the best. I can't say I'm sorry enough even though what I'm apologizing for is (hopefully possibly?) not even on your radar anymore. But even though I thought I was doing everything for you, I didn't stop to consider how you might be feeling or what you might be thinking and how much you were having to overcome while it was all happening. But I want you to know that I am all in, and I am on this theoretical boat with you. I never mind doing things for you because I feel light & free when I'm around you. Yes we've had our issues at times, but it happens, and we get through it, because without all the sideline drama, we are honestly close to perfect together. I don't mean WE are perfect, I mean that the dynamic between us is. On our best days, we lift each other up and laugh for hours and dance and sing and jovially pick on each other and hold hands. Its one of those things... Its rare and frolicsome and unsaleable and special and nothing can match it.
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There is more to come, at a later time. Its late o'clock.
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