buh! I have a kind of preliminary teeny tiny small miniscule idea for a new STORY! squee!! More like character inspiration, but I think it could manifest itself into something good. If only I had time to actually write it.
And I am over it with someone I referred to as a mentor in a previous post. guh. So not true.
And I hate being hungry at 2am.
AND I THINK I MIGHT GET TO SEE SARAH TOMORROW AND THAT IS A TOTAL HOLLABACK MOMENT!!!!
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Friday, March 27, 2009
opinions
1. I no longer care about youtube. I don't enjoy making videos anymore, and will probably only go along with this collab channel thing until I have someone to take my place. It is not worth it, and "online friends" are pretty much the least loyal people ever.
2. H2H is an epic fail. Yes, we are a non-audition choir, and yes, we are not going to be amazing, and yes, there are going to be setbacks. But seriously. Jesus walks among the lampstands, and ours is burnt out. We have lost sight of what God wants from us, and we suck. Absolutely suck. I think we need to just step back & stop trying to push through like everything is okay. We need to talk this out & formulate a plan for how to make it better for the future. And I am pretty furious about the fact that no one wants to do anything about it but me & Samantha. And someone needs to start fucking listening to me. I have laid down the ultimatum that I WILL NOT sing at Joy Jam if we don't seriously make a plan to sing easy songs [aka- Lean on Me, All Hail, etc.] that will ensure our appeared success. I will go, but unless someone listens to me, I will not get up on that stage. I refuse to continue to embarass myself. I am over it.
3. Probably my biggest annoyance, as of now, is people who take me away from other people/people who stand in the way of my time with other people.
4. I want to participate in 24/7 prayer.
2. H2H is an epic fail. Yes, we are a non-audition choir, and yes, we are not going to be amazing, and yes, there are going to be setbacks. But seriously. Jesus walks among the lampstands, and ours is burnt out. We have lost sight of what God wants from us, and we suck. Absolutely suck. I think we need to just step back & stop trying to push through like everything is okay. We need to talk this out & formulate a plan for how to make it better for the future. And I am pretty furious about the fact that no one wants to do anything about it but me & Samantha. And someone needs to start fucking listening to me. I have laid down the ultimatum that I WILL NOT sing at Joy Jam if we don't seriously make a plan to sing easy songs [aka- Lean on Me, All Hail, etc.] that will ensure our appeared success. I will go, but unless someone listens to me, I will not get up on that stage. I refuse to continue to embarass myself. I am over it.
3. Probably my biggest annoyance, as of now, is people who take me away from other people/people who stand in the way of my time with other people.
4. I want to participate in 24/7 prayer.
shattered
I have reached my breaking point. And as of last night, I shattered into a million little pieces. Today, I put them back together. I slept late, skipped a class, and spent time with good friends, and most importantly, focused on JESUS. It was great.
And, of course, I am putting off studying for my econ quiz that I will be taking in about 9 hours. guh.
But, while I'm here, I just want to say:
1. Rachel is AMAZING. She is seriously one of the best friends I've ever had, and even though she is pretty much at her breaking point as well, she agreed to have coffee with me & talk about my failing life. I love her.
2. Erin is my fun size sunshine. =]] She can make me LAUGH like no one else can.
3. Taylor is my person. Just like on Grey's. ;D
4. Leslie is my mentor.
5. Jamie is the constant bestie. lol. bestie.
Yay friends.
I love you all. <3
And, of course, I am putting off studying for my econ quiz that I will be taking in about 9 hours. guh.
But, while I'm here, I just want to say:
1. Rachel is AMAZING. She is seriously one of the best friends I've ever had, and even though she is pretty much at her breaking point as well, she agreed to have coffee with me & talk about my failing life. I love her.
2. Erin is my fun size sunshine. =]] She can make me LAUGH like no one else can.
3. Taylor is my person. Just like on Grey's. ;D
4. Leslie is my mentor.
5. Jamie is the constant bestie. lol. bestie.
Yay friends.
I love you all. <3
Sunday, March 22, 2009
weird dreams
So, I had a very weird dream last night. Very weird.
I was on a road trip with Jamie I think, and for some reason we had some little kid with us. Well, this kid kept stealing things from people.. like glasses, and other odd small items... as we went on our way. So then we are at my house, and my father was there, being weird as always. And Rachel was there. And apparently this kid had stolen Rachel's glasses, and she got super mad at me for it for some reason.. & then I had to explain that this child was a theif & such & then she stopped being mad at me.
And then I dreamed that I saw Sarah somewhere & I went up to her & she was in costume.. like she had just been in a show or something & I was like "Hey Sarah! I miss you! I haven't seen you in forever!" and hugged her and held her hand, and then someone else came up and hugged her, but she kept holding my hand. And that was all.
lol. random.
I have so much going through my mind lately... life is absolutely insane and I have a lot to do and even more to think about. Why doesn't God just put up billboards telling you what to do!?! That would make life SO much easier.
I was on a road trip with Jamie I think, and for some reason we had some little kid with us. Well, this kid kept stealing things from people.. like glasses, and other odd small items... as we went on our way. So then we are at my house, and my father was there, being weird as always. And Rachel was there. And apparently this kid had stolen Rachel's glasses, and she got super mad at me for it for some reason.. & then I had to explain that this child was a theif & such & then she stopped being mad at me.
And then I dreamed that I saw Sarah somewhere & I went up to her & she was in costume.. like she had just been in a show or something & I was like "Hey Sarah! I miss you! I haven't seen you in forever!" and hugged her and held her hand, and then someone else came up and hugged her, but she kept holding my hand. And that was all.
lol. random.
I have so much going through my mind lately... life is absolutely insane and I have a lot to do and even more to think about. Why doesn't God just put up billboards telling you what to do!?! That would make life SO much easier.
Saturday, March 14, 2009
simply the best
These are my top 5 favorite actresses of all time, as of now. I admire them, all for different reasons, and perhaps after reading this, you will too.
She is pretty much the most incredible person to grace Hollywood. She was a revolutionary in so many respects. She was a different kind of beauty; not the blonde-haired, blue eyed, cookie cutter that was a Zeigfeld girl, but Lucy was something new. She was the first woman to be un-intimidated by physical comedy onscreen, and would put herself in any ridiculous situation on camera for the sake of a good laugh. She went on to become the first female executive in a television studio, and she and her husband Desi were pioneers of an enterprise. But I suppose, the most important thing, is that Lucy never failed to get all of America to root for her. She was charming, endearing, and she made us smile. I loved, and will always love, Lucy.
Yes, she played Karen Walker- the drunken, drugged, dazed, and unfeeling socialite on 'Will & Grace.' But there was more... Megan's Karen was deeper, had feelings, and was hiding a lot from her friends, and that is why it was so memorable. That underneath the comedy, there was sorrow. The brilliance of the actress shone through in the depth of the performance. She knows what life is all about, "Its not important who you love, its that you love."
It is unfortunate that Jennifer is most often thought of for her famous haircut, "The Rachel," or her multiple failed relationships, most notably her divorce from Brad Pitt. There is so much more. She was Rachel Green on "Friends," the most popular sitcom from 1994-2003, and she was the most adored character. That's a lot to say. She is a brilliant actress, and a philanthropist, and seriously, don't you just want to be her friend?
She is my newest fav. This girl has grown up in the limelight, she is the last of a long show business legacy that began with the turn of the 20th century. Her grandfather was a legend, her father was a gem, and she is a phenomenon. Ever since the child was cast as the little sister in E.T., America has been in love. She made it through the trials that life in Hollywood can bring as a teen, and stands before us now as an award winning actress and producer. She is America's sweetheart, and she understand every single character she plays. She is not afraid to put herself among those who are struggling, and even protested Prop 8 in California out in the streets with the 'commoners.' She is edgy, quirky, loving, quick witted, smart, funny, everything we are, and all we want to be. Life is very interesting. In the end, some of your greatest pains become your greatest strengths.
Lucille Ball
She is pretty much the most incredible person to grace Hollywood. She was a revolutionary in so many respects. She was a different kind of beauty; not the blonde-haired, blue eyed, cookie cutter that was a Zeigfeld girl, but Lucy was something new. She was the first woman to be un-intimidated by physical comedy onscreen, and would put herself in any ridiculous situation on camera for the sake of a good laugh. She went on to become the first female executive in a television studio, and she and her husband Desi were pioneers of an enterprise. But I suppose, the most important thing, is that Lucy never failed to get all of America to root for her. She was charming, endearing, and she made us smile. I loved, and will always love, Lucy. Bernadette Peters
This woman is the queen of Broadway. I mean, good God, LOOK AT HER! She is incredibly amazing, and is able to make every role she plays seem like the heroine. Even if it is Cinderella's wicked stepmother. Her singing will make you melt, and her acting will bring you to laughter or tears, depending of course on the moment. She is magic. Wouldn't you want to follow this woman, wherever she may lead you?
Megan Mullally
Yes, she played Karen Walker- the drunken, drugged, dazed, and unfeeling socialite on 'Will & Grace.' But there was more... Megan's Karen was deeper, had feelings, and was hiding a lot from her friends, and that is why it was so memorable. That underneath the comedy, there was sorrow. The brilliance of the actress shone through in the depth of the performance. She knows what life is all about, "Its not important who you love, its that you love." Jennifer Aniston
It is unfortunate that Jennifer is most often thought of for her famous haircut, "The Rachel," or her multiple failed relationships, most notably her divorce from Brad Pitt. There is so much more. She was Rachel Green on "Friends," the most popular sitcom from 1994-2003, and she was the most adored character. That's a lot to say. She is a brilliant actress, and a philanthropist, and seriously, don't you just want to be her friend?Drew Barrymore
She is my newest fav. This girl has grown up in the limelight, she is the last of a long show business legacy that began with the turn of the 20th century. Her grandfather was a legend, her father was a gem, and she is a phenomenon. Ever since the child was cast as the little sister in E.T., America has been in love. She made it through the trials that life in Hollywood can bring as a teen, and stands before us now as an award winning actress and producer. She is America's sweetheart, and she understand every single character she plays. She is not afraid to put herself among those who are struggling, and even protested Prop 8 in California out in the streets with the 'commoners.' She is edgy, quirky, loving, quick witted, smart, funny, everything we are, and all we want to be. Life is very interesting. In the end, some of your greatest pains become your greatest strengths.
it has to be said
Dear You;
1. I don't understand you. I sincerely do not. One moment you seem so wonderful; like one of the most sweet, kind & generous people i have ever known. The next moment, you seem selfish, pushy, and as if you don't care to know me at all. And, surprisingly, I am oddly okay with that. I have learned, very quickly, that you are not to be depended upon. Its okay. I love you. But I won't, I refuse, to let you bring me down.
2. I miss you, and that has been true for quite a while, and will remain true until May it seems. I wish we talked more. I know nothing about you. Not enough for my liking anyway. But you really are my fav.
Just these.
Its all I've got for now.
The rest of the air is clear.
1. I don't understand you. I sincerely do not. One moment you seem so wonderful; like one of the most sweet, kind & generous people i have ever known. The next moment, you seem selfish, pushy, and as if you don't care to know me at all. And, surprisingly, I am oddly okay with that. I have learned, very quickly, that you are not to be depended upon. Its okay. I love you. But I won't, I refuse, to let you bring me down.
2. I miss you, and that has been true for quite a while, and will remain true until May it seems. I wish we talked more. I know nothing about you. Not enough for my liking anyway. But you really are my fav.
Just these.
Its all I've got for now.
The rest of the air is clear.
Sunday, March 8, 2009
i feel so much spring.
The weather is perfect. I am sitting on my living room floor at home, and the door is open, so I can feel the lovely breeze. I am uploading music onto itunes; showtunes of course. And life is good. Things have just gone amazingly well in the past week or so.
School is great as always.
I got into the show I have been DYING to be in since 11th grade when I fell in love with it... Can we start rehearsals like, now!?! I think I might pass out with joy when we actually get to rehearse and perform it. Wow. Love.
Also, we finally found a new Monday person for the collab channel, which takes SO much stress off me. :D
AND, I am NOT BORED! YAY. I thought I would come home and not have plans and die of boredom from being at home, but its going well so far. I went to lunch with mom today, am going to Raven Rock with Catherine tomorrow, and then Tuesday I am spending the afternoon shopping, eating, and seeing a movie with mom. This means I will probably use Wednesday to catch up on life tasks.. plan for summer maybe.. who knows. Then Jamie comes home, and we will find the zoo, and life will be good.
I can't get him off my mind either... I don't know what to do. I am so bad at this. lol.
School is great as always.
I got into the show I have been DYING to be in since 11th grade when I fell in love with it... Can we start rehearsals like, now!?! I think I might pass out with joy when we actually get to rehearse and perform it. Wow. Love.
Also, we finally found a new Monday person for the collab channel, which takes SO much stress off me. :D
AND, I am NOT BORED! YAY. I thought I would come home and not have plans and die of boredom from being at home, but its going well so far. I went to lunch with mom today, am going to Raven Rock with Catherine tomorrow, and then Tuesday I am spending the afternoon shopping, eating, and seeing a movie with mom. This means I will probably use Wednesday to catch up on life tasks.. plan for summer maybe.. who knows. Then Jamie comes home, and we will find the zoo, and life will be good.
I can't get him off my mind either... I don't know what to do. I am so bad at this. lol.
Monday, March 2, 2009
back to life, back to sense.
So, I fail at updating... life has been crazy busy & now here I am on the countdown to spring break!! woot!! Lots more to do this week though.. hopefully that will include a baller salad, a trip to b-skis or cosmic, ice cream with Sarah, and fun times free from too much homework.
We'll see how that goes.
Oh, I like him again. I had a dream about him... but no worries, it was very un-exciting. lol. But I liked it, and I woke up, and my first thought was "oh crap. not again." haha. I need to think more about this & decide whether or not I should say anything... like, maybe get advice from my cookie loving confidant.
Who knows.
Tomorrow is going to be absolutely ridiculous.
Pray that I keep my head on straight and am confident.. I have an audition, and I REALLY want to do well & get in the show. But if not, I have already resolved myself to believing that it is God's way of telling me that I don't have time...
I am so different from the person I was when I first came to UNC.
Its kinda weird.
I am enjoying where I am in my life right now.
That's all.
We'll see how that goes.
Oh, I like him again. I had a dream about him... but no worries, it was very un-exciting. lol. But I liked it, and I woke up, and my first thought was "oh crap. not again." haha. I need to think more about this & decide whether or not I should say anything... like, maybe get advice from my cookie loving confidant.
Who knows.
Tomorrow is going to be absolutely ridiculous.
Pray that I keep my head on straight and am confident.. I have an audition, and I REALLY want to do well & get in the show. But if not, I have already resolved myself to believing that it is God's way of telling me that I don't have time...
I am so different from the person I was when I first came to UNC.
Its kinda weird.
I am enjoying where I am in my life right now.
That's all.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)